Saturday, February 28, 2009

Weight, a girls best friend....LOL

Being a female, we often times if not constantly obsess about our physique. I am one who is constantly obsessing. Growing up I was small but not a stick skinny little girl, like my sister Kimi. I had friends who were and I remember being fully aware of it since preschool. I had a friend at Page's Preschool, Brianne, and she was a tall skinny girl. I've always been conscious of my size. Then the lovely years of high school came. If I only had a scanner I'd show the transition from pre-puberty to during etc. My sophomore year started out ok. I was what I'd consider to be average. But then by the time Senior year rolled around I was huge. Then a year after that I got even bigger. I was fully aware of my size. I hated that I was so much bigger than my friends. Then suddenly it started to go away. I've never been a person to diet or exercise, I always just eat whatever and sometimes I'll exercise but never consistently. I got so much more self confidence after losing some weight. Eventually I got to be pretty comfortable with myself. Still very conscious, but comfortable.

Anyways, I still always notice if my pants are a little bit snug or my arms are toned or flabby. I've been obsessing quite badly lately. Still, not really changing my eating or exercising excessively but each day I stand in front of the mirror and notice what I like and what I don't like. Sad thing is I'm definately on the smaller end of my physique spectrum, but the list of things I don't like is far longer than the list of things I do. I suppose that it might always just be that way, no matter what size or how old I might just always obsess about it. Hopefully it'll change, maybe I need to practice "The Secret" and convince myself that I'm happy with me.

Today I was definately having a "fat" day. Stupid thing is, I know that I shrunk my pants because the length is about flooding. So I know that the reason my pants are so snug is that I shrunk them, yet I can't help but hate the feeling of my sides gushing over the top of my pants and barely being able to bend down and that just makes me feel yucky! But then, Little Princess and I had our cute little friends birthday party to attend this afternoon. As soon as we walked in my sweet friend Krissie told me that she just had to tell me about this compliment. So I listened, our friend (who in my perception has a perfect little body) was in a store and saw a girl with a brand of jeans on that she also owned. She thought they looked so good on this girl and wanted hers to look like that on her. The girl turned her head was ME! She didn't say anything to me that day, I guess she just turned and walked out of the store. She ended up at the birthday party too, and told me the same story. I was amazed. I never in a million years thought any one would think that about me. Now as pathetic as it will sound but I'll say it anyways, it made my day! It was a good day to hear a compliment like that.

I hope that you won't read this thinking that I'm bragging or being concieted, because I assure you that is not my intention. It just so funny to me how such a little comment can make me feel so much better.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Being a MOM

I've been a pretty independent person, I worked to help financially support my family when I was married to Little Princess' Daddy, I worked even harder after the divorce to keep the same lifestyle for her and myself. Now, being a stay-at-home mom I sometimes feel like I contribute nothing and feel so guilty when I spend money on anything other than necessities. I feel like I'm a disappointment to everyone; however I know it's not true, I know that being a mom to my children is more important than bringing in a paycheck, but sometimes I can't help but feel like a lazy bum. Being a mom is so hard. Taking care of the kids each and every day can be hard work, I wonder if I'm too grouchy, wonder if I'm teaching them the things that they need to be kind, loving, respectful, and fun children, I wonder if I let Little Princess watch too much TV and don't play with her enough, I wonder if I'm doing what I'm supposed to with Little Man. I'm sure that many mom's have questioned themselves the same way that I do, and if not please don't burst my bubble of hope because that's what I tell myself to keep me going.

I absolutely love being a mom though. I have so much fun watching these two little angels interact with the world and it respond to them. It brings me so much happiness every time I see a smile on their faces and hear the music of their laughter. I feel like a first time mom. When Little Princess was born I needed to continue working so she spent the time I was at work with my Mom. I'm fortunate enough to have a mom that was able to help me out and raise my daughter while I was working. They have such an incredible bond developed between them, and while it was hard at times to have Little Princess prefer my mom over me, it is such a blessing. I'm glad that they have that. I remember on the weekends that I didn't work, I'd panic about having to take care of my child. I didn't know what to do, and the funny thing is that I felt like that until she was probably 9 months. So now with Little man everything seems new. It's fun and exciting.

When we got home from the cruise and I saw my Little Man he'd seriously grown so much. He's so stinking dang cute. I just can't get enough of him. He's the best baby. I thought Little Princess was the perfect baby and I said I would have 10 children if they'd all be like her, everyone told me that the next one would be a stinker. WRONG, he's even better. He never fusses, unless he needs a diaper change or he's hungry or tired. He is always smiling. He is content to sit in his swing or lay on the ground with his toys. I just couldn't ask for a better baby.

Tonight we started our bedtime routine and was getting his jammies on him and he just started to laugh. Not just a little giggle but the laughter that comes from the gut. It was so cute, so I had to just lay there and talk to him and tickle his little collarbone. Then he started to twist to his side, which he's been doing a lot of lately. We've just been waiting for him to roll over. He was so close, but his shoulder was in the way. It was fun just laying and talking jibberish with him. Then all of a sudden he made it all the way over, pulled out his shoulder from underneath him and lifted his head. He wasn't quite as impressed as I, but he was proud of himself none-the-less. Way to go Little Man.

Right before the big achievement.

Right after

Mommy cheering him on:)

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

How long is a week?

A week is my baby up-ing a clothing size, a few too many missed naps for Little Princess, being in 4 different countries, Little Man no longer fitting in his diapers, several days of missed exercise, wonderful nights full of sleep, tons and tons of delicious food, 5 loads of laundry, and likely a couple extra pounds hanging out around my mid-section.

What a week we all just had!! My wonderful parents spoiled the family (minus brax, cuz he's on his mission) and Grandpa Mutt and took us on a cruise to Meso-America. We all left on V-day, we traveled in 3 groups. Lover Boy, Little Princess and I had to make a pit stop in Denver to send Little Man to spend some special time with his Gramma Cheryl and Papa Joe. The rest of them stopped else where. Saturday it snowed terribly so we left plenty early to get to the airport with enough time. We made it there and of course our flight was delayed due to the stormy weather. We finally got to New Orleans late that night with starving bellies.

Ivy made a friend while we were getting some lunch in the airport:)

The kids were so good while waiting for our plane.

When we stopped in Denver to drop of Little Man with his grandparents, we were so lucky and got to meet Grandma Lauri for our first time.

We had all morning before we could board the ship so we went with some of the group to the Oak Alley Plantation. It was simply amazing. I loved it. I love the trees and the beautiful home. It is the plantation that was in the soap opera "Days of our Lives" where Bo and Hope were married. I did make sure that Lover Boy paid special attention to all the detail, because someday I would like a home just like that. demanding, yes I know.:)

Oak Alley

Our family standing on the 2nd floor balcony of the beautiful mansion with Oak Alley behind us.

Once we got to the ship our anticipation grew. None of us had ever been on a cruise and we were so excited to say the least. We had so much fun on the ship. We ate to our hearts content and the boys had contests (I swear it had to be a contest) to see who could eat the most. We definately got dad's moneys worth for how much they pigged out. It was funny to watch them eat so much. Little Princess loved the Kids Crew. They did so many fun things: Princess Party, Talent Show, PJ Party, Pool Party, Wild Safari, Bugs and Butterfly, Mardi Gras Party, they had movie times and learned all sorts of hilarious songs. She was so excited to go each day. My favorite thing was the Talent Show. My mom, Aunt Tonya and I headed to the theater. We waited because there was a sign on the door that said rehearsal was going on. After realizing we must be in the wrong spot, we rushed to the other end of the ship and walked in to where it was being held while Little Princess's class was on the stage singing. My dad grabbed us and showed us the seats he'd saved for us but I couldn't see (my vision is terrible, especially in the dark room) so I headed up to the front and knelt down behind the little kiddies. Little Princess was so cute. The class had their faces painted like bumble bees. They were singing and doing hand movements then all of a sudden Little Princess just sits down on the stage. She starts rolling around in her dress and being totally oblivious to the program. She had me laughing so hard. Then when it was time to sit so a little girl could do her talent Ivy stood right up. I assume she couldn't see sitting down. It was so cute though. I was laughing so hard at her, along with everyone else around me, that it made tears start to roll down my cheeks. I sat and wondered if she was just bored, didn't have any friends, or just overwhelmed by it all, whatever it was it was just so cute, and unfortunately I didn't have my camera with me.

Pictures of Kids Crew Face Painting:

Lion face for the Wild Safari

Mardi Gras mask

Bumble Bee face for Talent show, they sang "Bringing Home my Baby Bumble Bee"

Pool Party- can you believe there was over 20 little kids in this Hot Tub?! There was barely room for Little Princess to sneak her legs in, but she did end up sliding in the rest of her body after some shifting of the kiddos.

Boys Pigging Out:

Joe enjoying a little midnight snack...I think there were 4 orders of Chicken Strips.

Kevin enjoying a double burger with a steak also..."You the man" he made a friend while eating this who kept hollering "You the MAN". It was hilarious.

Misc. Pictures:

Everywhere we went Little Princess was on someone's shoulder. She never had to walk. Lucky little thing. Thanks everyone for helping carry her all over. I'd have died or gone crazy listening to her cry that she couldn't walk anymore.

While on the ship one night they had Family Feud, Joe's name was drawn and he got to play. They didn't win, but really the game wasn't fair. It was so fun to watch though. We love that show.

Me and my fabulous Daddy. We actually took this picture to make Little Princess jealous so she'd take a picture with...hmm, I can't remember if I wanted a picture with her or my dad did, anyhow it didn't work; but I did get this good one of us:)

The ruins were incredible. Day 1 off the ship was in Costa Maya, MEX. The poor area was not beautiful to look at because of the Hurricane 2 years ago that had wiped out everything. We did enjoy the ruins though.

What a sight, huh?!

Little Princess climbing while we were listening about the history of the site.

Day 2 was in Guatemala. This was our favorite area. The land is simply beautiful. It was lush and green everywhere.

Day 3 was Belize. I loved Belize, it looked a little more wealthy than the previous 2 places. The food there was delicious that they served.

We had to take a boat ride down a river to see the beautiful temples. It was fun, we saw a few crocodiles in there.

Temple in Belize, it was huge. We did all climb it, coming down made my heart miss a few beats. I was terrified that I might trip (and for those of you who know me, know that is not a far fetched idea because I'm always tripping), but everyone made it down unharmed.

This is the view from atop that ginormous temple. Isn't is simply stunning?

Joe pulled down a few lemons and ate them. I tried one slice, ooooh it sure was sour.

Day 4 was back in Mexico but at Playa del Carmen. We just relaxed at the beach. This was Little Princess's favorite day. She didn't have to walk anywhere and could just play. We did alot of shopping here. It was beautiful. The water was amazing.

Little Princess enjoying a day without walking and just playing. It was a beautiful beach!

After 8 long days I finally got to hold my Little Man again. It was the best! He was so much bigger than I left him, and this is true because he really did out grow his diapers and clothes in that week.

In short: We had a completely WONDERFUL time, THANKS SO MUCH MOM & DAD!!

Thursday, February 12, 2009

We are "Favorite Girls"

Lover Boy ran to the grocery store to get some things for dinner tonight. He came in and surprised Little Princess and I with beautiful flowers and Valentine wishes for his "favorite girls"! (For Valentine's Day we will be traveling...same as last year, lucky us)

Such lucky girls!

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Good Intentions Gone Bad

In my attempt to be a good mom and teach my daughter some better eating habits (which is funny, because she actually eats really well) I over did it and failed miserably.

Lover Boy and I weren't hungry for dinner Tuesday night, so I asked Little Princess what she would like to eat.

"Macaroni & Cheese!" I should've known that would be her answer, that or spaghetti. I have no problem feeding her good ole Mac and Cheese, but thought that I'd throw in a veggie as a side dish for her.

Little Princess always fusses when we eat peas. She loves corn and broccoli and we can always get her to eat a little bit of beans. I decided that maybe if I give her peas more frequently she'll learn to like them too.

So I dished her Macaroni and put four spoonfuls (about 1/4 cup) of peas on her plate. That's really not that much and figured she'd be able to eat that amount. She ate the Mac & Cheese just fine, but when it came time to eat her peas she of course started to put up a stink over it. I told her she wasn't allowed to play or leave until those peas were gone!

I ended up feeding her the peas, all of them. Way to go Little Princess!! We did make a big deal out of this and told her "see it wasn't that bad no was it?"

Within 30 minutes this is what she looked like!

I guess it was worse than I could've ever imagined for her. :( She had a major allergic reaction. Luckily her throat didn't swell and her breathing was fine. Lover Boy ran to the store (this is one of those times that I absolutely love living right across the street from the grocery store) and got her some Benadryl. Within 20 minutes she was out cold. I carried her to bed, then headed to bed myself. About 30 minutes later I could hear screaming on the baby monitor, it was obvious it wasn't the baby, it was Little Princess! I ran upstairs and she was hysterical. Her arms and legs were just shaking and she wouldn't open her eyes. I put her in my arms and carried her down stairs to grab my phone.
~side note: I had called my mom when we first saw the reaction to make sure I was safe in just giving her Benadryl and not taking her to the dr. My mom had asked if I would like my dad to come up and give her a blessing, I told her that if the Benadryl didn't do anything then it'd be nice but I'd let her know.

So I called my mom to see if my dad could come and give her a blessing. He wasn't home yet from his bishopric meetings, but she said she'd run to the church and get him. Then I realized that I had better call her dad, despite it being his birthday and him being out with his wife. I called him and he said they'd be right over.

I carried Little Princess back upstairs so Lover Boy could hopefully get some rest. Little Princess couldn't stop screaming, she jumped out of my arms and just ran in circles waving her arms and kicking her legs. It was awful for me to watch. I tried to ask her what she was feeling, but she didn't even recognize that I was talking to her. I tried to comfort her, but again it was like I wasn't even there. Finally she started to calm down. I told her that Papa was coming over and so was her daddy, she rested her head on my chest and was out again.

Everyone showed up to my house around 10:00 p.m. My dad annointed Little Princess, then her daddy gave her a beautiful blessing that she would fight this reaction and get better. She never flinched or woke up or anything. I put her back in her bed and we decided it'd be best for me to sleep with her in case anything happened again. She slept wonderfully (I wish I could same the same for me).

When she woke in the morning she was still a little swollen. I told her if it didn't go down by noon, we'd run to the dr. and have her check out.

We ended up at the Dr. and he said that sure enough it looked like a food allergy. He said her reaction was to the Benadryl, some children have a reaction like that to something in it mixed with the red dye, so he gave us another anti-histamine.

Today she's practically back to beautiful. No more "Rocky" as her dad called her, or "Quasimodo" as Lover Boy called her.

Lucky girl, I will never force you to eat your peas again!!

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Maybe an Apartment would be nice!

For those of you who know me, know that I love my little old house. Despite the problems that I've had (and still have) with it, I love my old home. I've had major plumbing, flooding, flooring, electrical and a few other problems with this little place I love calling home. Regardless of the problems, I have always loved living here. My dad has often suggested that I just sell it, but I can't let go of it.

However, this morning I am questioning myself. Maybe an apartment would be nicer. My only reason for thinking this is the stupid snow that I keep shoveling. In an apartment I wouldn't have to shovel, someone else would!

Yesterday morning by 9:30 a.m. I had shoveled the driveway 3 times. This morning when I woke up and saw it had snowed some more, I convinced myself to not shovel til about 9 or so because it would just keep snowing and I'd have to keep going out there. So all morning I relaxed inside, but felt the dread of what each hour passing meant...almost time to shovel.

Eventually I made it out there. The snow was coming off the ground quite nicely, til I reached the east half of the driveway and the edge near the sidewalk. That darn snow is stuck to the cement! (Yes, the picture is after I shoveled for 45 minutes, lol) My shoulders are a little sore from yesterday so I decided I was not going to force it off but just remove that top layer that slid off like melted butter.

Last year my driveway was a danger zone. I was working all day everyday and a few nights at a part time second job. So when it would snow, I wouldn't have time to shovel. My roommate was also busy with school and work. Our cars were constantly stuck in the driveway! One time my car was so stuck that I tried shoveling under the wheels and it seemed to do the trick until SMACK right into the side of my house. Then I was stuck in that snow. It was just messy!

Fortunately this year I'm not working and so I am able to kinda keep up on this tedious task. Ugh! I LOVE THE SNOW. Lol, I actually do I just don't like my driveway being covered in it.

Monday, February 9, 2009

Monday= Grandparents Day

Not only was today the day I decided to do Grandparents Day (Monday), but it was also my Gramma Ruthie's birthday. Little Princess and I were going to make Great Gramma Ruthie a birthday cake and meet my mom at her house, however our power kept flickering in and out and I figured I would hate to be in the middle of baking the cake and have the power go out. (Lover boy later reminded me that the oven in the basement is So instead we opted to hit Albertsons and buy a cake already made. Ivy picked out the Snickers cake, which was a delicious decision.

We went to Great Gramma's and had a lot of fun visiting with her and Great Grampa John. Little Princess did an entire puzzle by herself, and it was a "real" puzzle, you know the kind with 100 small pieces. She did really well and had fun learning that Great Gramma Ruthie loves to do puzzles too! Great Gramma said we'll have to go visit more often or even just schedule a play date for her and Little Princess.

Little Man was so good, he just ate his lunch and had tons of smiles for everyone.

Sunday, February 8, 2009

Sleep over, it's worth a shot

Some nights Little Princess has trouble going to sleep. She'll come downstairs about every 5 minutes for one more hug and kiss until I'm ready for bed and tell her no more hugs and kisses. The other night she was doing this, but she started to cry because she really just couldn't go to sleep. I suggested that she read a bedtime story to all her stuffed animals. Minutes later I could hear her little feet running across the hardwood floor above my head, then I heard "Mommy, can I have just one more hug and kiss?" She then informed me that reading to her animals didn't make her tired. So I suggested she sing to them til she falls asleep. 5 minutes later pitter-patter feet running above my head.
By this point I was just exhausted and ready for my head to rest on the pillow, close my eyes and be out! Trying to think of something that would surely work this time, without giving in and letting her watch TV or a movie (she doesn't EVER fall asleep, but stays awake all night watching movies), I came up with a brilliant idea, however I didn't realize just how brilliant it was at the time.
"Why don't you go get all your stuffed animals and take them and have a sleep over?"
~confused look on her face, with a hint of excitement.
"Go grab Pinky Bear, I'm a Child of God Bear, Care Bear Zebra, Pink Tigger, and all the other ones and take them in the living room and have a sleep over with them on the couch!"
Full of excitement she ran upstairs, I once again heard her feet above my head but could tell she was in the living room.
Morning came and the cutie was sleeping on the hardwood floor, NOPE not on the rug but right next to it. I looked at the 2 couches, one was empty and the other had all her animals on it. I woke Little Princess and asked her why on earth she would sleep on the awfully hard floor and not the soft couch. "Well Mommy, there just wasn't room with all my stuffed animals, so I had to sleep on the floor!" How cute?!

Ivy and her stuffed animals that she sleeps with each night

So here I sit in the same place Little Princess slept, on the hard hardwood at 5 minutes to 4 a.m....hmmm, Little Man should've woke up about 30 minutes ago for his feeding, o-well...I woke at 12:30 a.m. to feed my baby, about 1 a.m. I headed back downstairs to return to dreamland. But I couldn't. I wasn't even tired! O-my-heck I couldn't believe this, for about the last 3 1/2 years (since becoming a Mom) I haven't had a problem going to sleep. My eyes just have to catch a glimpse of the pillow and my mind is done thinking and ready for sleep. I always brag about never laying in bed with my thoughts racing or being tired but unable to drift off into sweet slumber. But now it's here. I'm going crazy! I've read blog after blog, got tons of ideas for projects that I want to start, checked all my emails, checked my online banking, searched no sleep taking over my eyes.
I'm going to go kidnap Little Princess's animals and see if they will work their sleeping magic on me. Perhaps if I lay them all around me on the couch it'll work just like with Little Princess....However, If there isn't room for all of us on the couch, it will NOT be me sleeping or laying on the hardwood floor, it will be the cotton filled bears, zebra, and bunnies!
{YAWN!} Maybe it will work, just the thought brought on a yawn.

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Grandparent's Day/Week/Month!?

The plan: Each Monday we visit one of my grandparents (all of my grandparents are still alive as well as one great-grandma). This way we could see each of them once a month.

The purpose: My children can have memories with their great-grandparents. And the great-grandparents can have relationships with my children.

The follow through: Me being,, I didn't get started quite the first of January like I'd hoped, but we did get started.

Our first visit was to my great-gramma Bernice. I hadn't seen her in almost 2 years! I'm terrible I know, but hey I'm trying to be better. We went to visit Gramma Bernice on a Monday afternoon, and luckily she was home! Little Princess was greeted with hugs and snuggles galore, then cookies, crackers and popsicles. Yes, just the perfect greeting from a gramma! Gramma Bernice couldn't stop being amazed at how she'd grown! I think the last time she'd seen her was when little princess was maybe a year old. Then onto Little Man, "What a handsome little baby". It was so fun to sit in her beautiful house and reminisce about all our memories. I was so glad that we started our visits with Great-Gramma Bernice! I was so bad though, I meant to take my camera to capture this precious moments of my children with their great-great-gramma but I left it at home on the counter. Fortunately Gramma had her camera so she at least got some pictures of all of us together.

Then, me being me again, we missed a few weeks. Now I'll be completely honest, I'm nervous about visiting one of my gramma's. Don't know why for sure, I know that she'd be glad to have us over...but still I'm nervous about it, maybe it's because when I mentioned my plan to her she responded with "well, I'm pretty busy and might not be home" so I tried to arrange a time with her but the conversation was changed to something else and so...
My other gramma, who I just know without a doubt would be thrilled to have us come visit, spends her winters in Arizona. So we have to wait til she returns to visit her.
And then I'd thought that maybe grampa Mutt might think it was funny of us to come visit because we have Sunday dinner with him a few times a month anyways, so I was able to procrastinate in going to visit him. (I just enjoy being lazy lately...actually, I hate being lazy but sometimes it's just easier to stay home than get ready and go out).

Last week we spent every morning with Grampa Mutt. My little sister and brother were staying with him while my parents were out of town, and my little sister needed help doing her hair for school, so every morning we would take Lover Boy to work then go straight to Grampa Mutts to help get Kimi ready. Little Princess loved it. She would sit with Grampa in his big chair and watch cartoons, eat breakfast, and watch more cartoons. When the week was over, Little Princess so sad that we would no longer be going to Papa Mutts in the mornings. Then, I got on a kick that I really should be working out and Papa Mutt has an elliptical machine that I could use, so now this week we've started going over around 8:00 so I can workout for a few minutes on the death machine and she can watch "The Flying Nun" with papa Mutt. I must admit that it is quite a highlight in my day to watch her with him. They are such good friends! Even Little Man enjoys our time spent with Great Papa. Little Man just smiles and coos at him.
Little Princess likes to take her puzzle everywhere and show everyone just how good she is at it:)

Tonight we were just sitting in the living, Little Princess doing a puzzle, Lover Boy on the computer, and I was feeding Little Man his din din when Little Princess looked up and said "Mommy, can I please have a sleep over with great Papa tomorrow because it's Friday?" How sweet is that?! I know great papa would let her, but tomorrow starts her weekend with her daddy.

I hope that my children can have great relationships with their grandparents! I have with mine and I've noticed how fortunate I am to. It makes me sad that both of my children's Grandparents on their daddy's side live out of Utah. But in a week Little Man gets to spend an entire week with his Papa Joe and Gramma Cheryl. I'm glad that they will get to see him at this fun stage. He will also be meeting his Gramma Lauri for the first time, how exciting is that?! Then in a month or so Little Princess will likely be going to Mexico for a month to spend time with her Abuelos. Even if they don't get to see them all the time, I still hope that they will be close to them and have strong relationships with them.

Sunday, February 1, 2009

Little Man's Blessing Day

Luckily for me Lover Boy is very supporting of my religious views. I think it was him who first mentioned Little Man being blessed. Lover Boy had been to Mya's baby blessing and my cousins little girls blessings; I guess he just knew that it was inevitable that I'd want Little Man to be blessed. While we discussed it and what it meant, he then asked if he had to perform the ordinance. I explained to him that he wasn't able to for a few reasons, not a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, he didn't hold the priesthood, and a few other things. He was a bit relieved.

Little Man received a very beautiful blessing from his Papa Larry. He was blessed with good health, a strong spirit and to be an important part of our family. I'm so fortunate to have my family be so good to me, Lover Boy and our children. I was pleasantly surprised to see so many of my extended family members there. It was such a wonderful day.